For the past few days I have been meditating on how important effective communication is. Being able to talk to people the right way is major all across the board, including spouses, family, children, co-workers, and people altogether. The lack of effective communication results in a lot of misunderstandings. It may sound very elementary, but if we avoid learning the lessons on how to communicate effectively, the resolve of any issue will not be in sight.
Before proceeding further let me explain what effective communication is. It’s not just talking; it’s saying words carefully that gets your point across without having a confrontational tone. It’s screening what you say before you say it. It’s asking yourself these questions before you open your mouth, “would I talk to me like I’m about to talk to them? Would I want to be talked to like that? Does what I’m thinking about saying contribute to further growth or further division? Do my words edify people or tear them down?” These are things we must ask ourselves before flying off the handle. Another point I’d like to make is, not talking does not constitute good communication, and neither does talking in abundance. Arguing is not talking effectively; neither is silence.
The lack of effective communication stems from many areas. I have been meditating on three: the lack of communication with God (prayer), assumptions and stereotypes. Let me briefly explain the first one.
If we do not learn how to communicate with God it will be difficult to know how to communicate with others. Think about it. The cross is vertical as well as horizontal. If our relationship with God is without effective communication, that same tone will occur in our earthly relationships. Have you paid attention lately to how you talk to God? Have you talked to Him at all, or do you only call on Him when you’re in trouble? Have you witnessed people in your life who only call on you when they want something but don’t seem to show up otherwise? Or maybe you’ve seen people who just come to you when they have issues, and you seem to always be their release container. Have you witnessed one-sided relationships where you’re doing all the giving and they are doing all of the receiving? We must learn how to be trained in the Spirit with wisdom, and even deeper, have the heart of God, to know how to communicate effectively.